Another day, another opportunity to swim

I am a slow swimmer, and even though I can keep going for ages, I don't think my time is improving much.  I am not out to shatter records, but a bit more speed would be nice.  I think that I am not physically strong enough yet.  So, I tried a new routine today.  Rather than just swimming freestyle for 2000-2400m, I swam 160m freestyle at normal speed and then 40m with a kick board- kicking with as much strength as I could muster.  I did this routine 10 times, so I completed 2000m in total.  I was breathing heavily, I was hotter than usual and my heart rate was definitely elevated more than when I just do freestyle.  I hope this helps me strengthen my legs and improve my cardio functions.  We shall see. 

 

I am also down .6 lbs.  I didn't lose anything when I was in the states, but in reality I barely moved at all.  This is one of the clear drawbacks to living in the suburbs.  In London I walk everywhere; it is a means of transportation.  In the suburbs, I drive for transportation- meaning that I only walk for the purpose of exercising.  And exercise of this nature doesn't always fit into my plans.  Oh well, now that I am back in London I should be able to shave off a bit more weight.  I'd love to be down 80+ lbs before I see Dr. K on August 1.  

 

In other news, we are hosting a 4th of July party this Saturday.  We always celebrated our independence from this wonderful country (note sarcasm) when we lived in the states and decided to continue this tradition after we moved.  We have about 25 people coming- Americans, Germans, Austrians, Welsh, British, and Italians- we will be the melting pot of West London this weekend.  I do all of the prep work and cooking (and I don't serve prepared dishes), and Kenny mans the grill.  I am starting with guacamole, salsa, pesto dip/crudite, and a white bean and arugula dip that I will put into individual croustades before serving.  For meats we are serving ribs, burgers and two types of sausage and sides will include a tomato salad, a spinach and pasta dish and corn on the cob.  I am also making key lime pies.  The only thing I won't be making is a strawberry and white chocolate cake.  I don't have the time or patience to bake in addition to everything else.  It doesn't look like a ton of food when I type it out, but I will need all of Friday and half of Saturday to prepare everything. 

 

So Friday will be a prep day.  At least I can relax a bit tomorrow. 

Gypsies, Freaky Eaters and Willpower

I landed in London this morning, and yes, it is rainy and gloomy.  I don't suffer from serious jet lag the way many do... lucky for me considering how frequently I travel among timezones.  On overnight flights I bring my own pillow, blanket, fuzzy socks, eye cover, Ambien, and bottle of water (purchased at the airport, of course).  I skip dinner, drink a glass of wine, pop an Ambien immediately upon boarding and then tuck myself in and stay in the same position until about an hour before landing.  My strategy works very well, and my fellow travelers are always amazed that I can sleep as they toss and turn for hours.  Still, I am lethargic for my first day or two back in town- and it doesn't help that I frequently wind up crashing on the couch for two or three hours during the afternoon.  To get myself up and moving, I went swimming right after landing.  Now I feel like I really need a nap, but I will blog instead. 

 

On my last night at my mom's, I watched My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding for the first time.  I was dumbstruck by what I saw (people living in caravans- without toilets- on purpose).  It was actually fascinating and was like watching an hour long competition... who can dress her daughter most like a tramp while not violating international standards regarding the welfare of children... but at the end, there was no prize.  Had there been a competition, all contestants would have tied.  Apparently tramp is the 'traveller' norm. 

 

Afterwards I saw the first few minutes of Freaky Eaters.  The subject of this episode was a 50 year old woman addicted to ice cream bars.  She had had gastric bypass a few years back, lost weight and then gained it (thanks to the ice cream) after her divorce.  What amazed me was the quantity of bars she would eat- up to 40 IN A DAY!  The show said that she had been doing this for over a year (3 years maybe) and had gained 50 lbs.  This woman must have a fabulous metabolism.  If I were to eat 20-40 ice cream bars per day, I am 100% certain that I would gain much more than 50 lbs over the course of a year or two; I would put that on in months. 

 

This got me pondering WLS and how so much of this process is mental.  The band, sleeve, and bypass are so instrumental to losing weight, but each of us could fully sabotage our progress in a matter of minutes- a 'little' pint of Haagen-Dazs, a bagel with scallion cream cheese (or better yet a bacon, egg and cheese on a buttered bagel), fried rice, penne ala vodka, and on, and on, and on.  Before I started the WLS process, it was easy to rationalize adding these unnecessary calories.  Assuming I was eating 3,000-5,000 a day (I never counted, but I didn't get to my weight by following a diet of moderation), it wasn't such a big deal to add in an extra THOUSAND calories some days.  After all, what is really wrong with a 20-35% increase in calories when what I ate tasted so damn good?  Now I recognize that this mentality, this ability to rationalize my sometimes ridiculous consumption, contributed to the dire situation that necessitated my WLS.  It just occurred to me that I have not brought a pint of ice cream into our flat since about a month before I was banded.  It is just too much of a risk to bring in that pint.  I am still not convinced that I could eat 1/4 cup and put the container back in the freezer, so I abstain.  The same goes for most of the other foods listed above; I do my best to avoid them.  If I must sample them on occasion, I do so out of the house.  No leftovers, no ability to take just one more bite, no nothing.  

 

I've always been annoyed by people who say (mostly in the form of a lecture) that weight loss is all willpower.  While this might be the case for many people, losing weight was so much more than mere willpower for me.  I was hungry and nothing in my mind could make me anything other than hungry.  With the help of the band, I am less hungry.  NOW my willpower must step in.  I could easily continue to eat all of the junk I desire.  I went right from the airport to the gym... didn't I earn a pint of ice cream?  Don't I deserve that 1,300 calories of ice cream- even though the reality is that I burned less than half of that working out?  Of course I don't deserve ice cream.  That is just silly, and it is no different from an alcoholic who deserves a glass of vodka after cleaning the house or after a tough day at work.  What I deserve are the results I can get from working out.  I deserve a leaner, less sweaty figure, a stronger body and lower blood pressure.  Sweets and fatty foods should not be my reward, and from what I read, an understanding of this is something that many successful bandsters and I have in common. 

I Love NJ

NJ is at the wrong end of many jokes, and I (kind of) get it.  Between the Sopranos and Jersey Shore, the state has had some pretty bad advertising.  Still, I love my home state.

   

Today was a great day.  Mom and I went to the beach, and this was our view...

     

   

Then we went to dinner, and we started with...

   

   

Followed by...

    

   

Which looked like this by the time I was done...

    

   

All while sitting on the water here...

   

  

Yeah, I love NJ... poke fun all you want. 

   

I am happy to report that I was able to eat the clams on the half shell and the lobster.  I had to chew the lobster tail nearly to death (I think I counted about 50 chews for some bites), but it was well worth the effort. 

    

In other news, I saw Dr. K yesterday.  I have lost 9 lbs this month, so no need for a fill:) 

The Beach Gods Hate Me

So I planned two beach days with girlfriends while in NJ, but the weather gods have had other plans.  Tuesday was overcast but tolerable.  Today was terrible- it rained, it poured, there was thunder, it was just bad.  I brought two gigantic checked bags with me from London on Monday, and I must have inadvertently packed some of the city's charming weather.  Not happy.  I hope for a beach weekend with mom but am not expecting much at this point. 

    

I have an appointment with Dr. K in the am.  I have lost this month, so I doubt she will fill me up.  That is fine though- no need for being too tight.  My scale hates me- this morning I am 4 lbs heavier than yesterday morning.  I don't know if I could have possibly consumed enough sodium to hold 4 lbs of water, but I am pretty sure that this is just water weight (other than maybe .5 lbs).  Boo!

Measuring Up

I flew back to NJ yesterday and am spending today at the beach.  Other than that, I have absolutely nothing to report. 

I hadn't measured myself since the first day of my liquid diet (Nov. 26), so I thought this would be a good time to see how I am doing in inches.  I am down 7" in my waist, 6.5" in my hips, 7.5" in my chest, 2" per upper arm, 0.25" per wrist, 4" per thigh and 2.5" per calf.

You Did It!

You did it! You did it!

You said that you would do it,
And indeed you did.

I thought that you would rue it;
I doubted you'd do it.

But now I must admit it
That succeed you did.

 

---

But you're the one who did it,
Who did it, who did it!

As sturdy as Gibraltar,
Not a second did you falter.

There's no doubt about it,
You did it!

 

---

 

For those of you who appreciated the references to My Fair Lady in my Ascot post, here is another one for you.  I've been singing this song for days, and I think the lyrics are very fitting for how I am feeling.  While the original lyrics were sung between Henry Higgins and Colonel Pickering after successfully passing Eliza Doolittle off as a proper lady at the Embassy Ball, I am just singing this to myself.  So I am the 'you', and the 'it' I am singing about is losing enough weight to get my BMI below 40.  This is all a very verbose way of saying I AM NO LONGER MORBIDLY OBESE!!! 

 

I was super obese on Day 1 of my liquid diet and quickly moved into the realm of the morbidly obese.  Even though 'super' sounds so much better than 'morbid', it isn't.  I really don't know why the people who name these stages of obesity don't call it 'super morbidly obese'.  Doesn't that sound more succinct?  It no longer matters to me, as neither term accurately reflects today's weight.  Now I am categorized as severely obese.  I would prefer something that sounds a bit more chipper, but no such luck.  So let's all start from the top and sing the first verse of You Did It to celebrate this accomplishment!  All together now...

 

The lyrics pretty much sum up weight loss with the band.  The band helps, but you must do the work YOURSELF.  It is a tool, and it is a fantastic tool.  I am trying to come up with some great analogy of how Henry Higgins is like the band and Eliza Doolittle is the woman who just had WLS.  It would take too much time to explain any further (and I would invariably bore many of you), but any MFL fans out there will get my point.  It was Eliza who had to do the work- struggle with unlearning old habits/learning correct ones- and then successfully implement what Henry Higgins was teaching her.  Henry Higgins was the TOOL.  If it were not for him aiding and teaching Eliza, she would have remained a Cockney flower girl in Covent Garden.  Once Eliza embraced what Henry Higgins was doing, she was able to become a success. 

 

When Eliza was finally able to pass herself off as a lady, Henry Higgins pranced around and took all the credit.  But this was a joint effort, and he didn't deserve all the credit.  He could have taught until he was blue in the face; if Eliza had no interest in the subject, his efforts would have been for naught.  Now onto my point--- the same goes for the band.  The band can do its best to help but can only help people who are interested in what it has to offer.  So many of us keep our WLS to ourselves because of negative comments concerning how we cheated or how we didn't lose weight the right way.  We didn't cheat.  We were just smart enough to use the tools available to us.  And let's even accept for a moment that we might have cheated a bit for the sake of argument (I mean, men cheat with Viagra and Cialis all the time, and that is acceptable).  I still refuse to let my band do a Henry Higgins and take all the credit- if I hadn't done the work, and if I hadn't retrained myself (with the help of the band), I would still be super or morbidly obese. 

 

I did it! I did it!

I said that I would do it,

And indeed I did:)

 

 

 

Adios Clarence

I woke up this morning and read that Clarence Clemons died.  All I can say is huge loss.  I am a Bruce fan- have been for years (decades).  Kenny is a fan as well.  Bruce's shows are always amazing, but they will be a little less so without Clarence on sax.  Boo:(